Wednesday, January 21, 2009

What's going on in my head Wednesday!

Today I'm choosing to write about my struggle with over-committment.

Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit" — yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, "If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that." As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil. (James 4:13-16)

As an event chair for a large volunteer organization, someone who tries very hard to stay actively involved in church, someone who desires a clean well kept home, and someone my friends and or family feel they can call on when they need a special dessert or craft project made.

I often struggle with over-committment.

As I'm sure you can tell from some of my daily schedules for myself I often run myself ragged from 5:00 AM to 12:00AM the next morning only to wake up and do it all again the next day. Please don't get me wrong I love my volunteer work, and love that my friends, family and church feel as though they can count on me. But sometimes I wish that I had time just for sitting and being quiet and calling upon the Lord more often. I will admit that my daily prayer times are usually during my commute to and from work or to and from events. I have done really well since the beginning of the year in making sure that I read my Bible daily and I'm glad for that but I often feel like just reading the Word and not taking the time to soak it up is really doing myself a disservice.

There are 2 reasons I can think of that I often over-commit myself

1 is that I truly do not like to disappoint people a little peice of my heart breaks when ever I hear disappointment in someone's voice and know that I caused it.

2. I like to think I'm super-woman sometimes and trust me I'm not but I think this superiority complex I have about myself stems from the fact that I have always been an over achiever and up until getting married I was successful at it.

The reality of the matter is I accomplish more in my day when I limit my tasks to a few specific things.

I have been struggling with this today especially as I failed to make an important phone call because I simply forgot. I have now disappointed this person and lost a little bit integrity in their eyes which means I will have to work twice as hard to regain that respect. Oy I hate that feeling. :(

Words are so powerful and "sure I can do that" have been my downfall more than once.

Dear Lord,

I pray that you give me the strength to say no to things when necessary. And the judgement to know when I have far too many things going on and need quiet time with you. I ask that you help me to remember I am by no means super-woman and would be nothing without your saving grace. Lord help me to keep those committments I do make and help me to only commit to the things I know I can keep.

In your precious name I pray,

Later Alligators......

Mrs. A

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